One of our older members, O.T. Hill, sends us The
Senility Prayer that he saw floating around the net. We edited it a bit, and
present it below. The Senility Prayer appears to be something adapted from The
Serenity Prayer, which is used by twelve-step programs. (O.T. won't tell us what
"O.T." stands for, but we can guess.)But first, let us show you the version of The
Serenity Prayer that is used by the Dull Men's Club, a two-step program (see
FAQs, click here):
God . . . grant me
the serenity that comes from changing very little . . . amen
THE SENILITY PRAYER
. . . grant me the senility to forget the people I've never liked,
good fortune to run into the ones that I do like,
the eyesight to see the difference
And, now that
I've grown older (but have I grown up?), here's what I've found:
I started out
with nothing. I still have most of it.
My wild oats
have turned into prunes and All Bran.
I finally got
my head together. But now my body is falling apart.
If God wanted
me to touch my toes, he would have put them on my knees.
I spend a lot
of time now thinking about the hereafter. I go somewhere to get something and
then wonder what I'm there after.
If all is not
lost, where is it?
It was easier
to get older than it was to get wiser.
It's hard to
make a comeback when you haven't been anywhere.
When I'm finally holding all the cards, why does everyone
decide to play chess?
you're the dog. Some days you're the hydrant.
remember ever being absent minded.
remember whether or not I’ve already E-mailed this to you.